Makeup Fast: Day 2 of 40 (I’m a Showoff)

(Written on Thursday, June 28, 2012)

In the shower this morning, I was thinking about my decision to avoid eating lunch in public yesterday, and something about it was really bothering me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I wasn’t avoiding seeing people I know just because I am ashamed of my naked face. There was more to it than that, but I wasn’t sure what.

After I finished drying my hair, I got to thinking about where I would go to do the morning-part of my work. (I work best when there is food and coffee readily available.) Usually I go to Sally Loos, because the coffee and food is BOMB, and I like the atmosphere. But today, I decided to stay in (again), and that’s when I got to thinking: how much of where I go is determined by what I look like? On the flip-side of hiding from people I know because I don’t like my face, there’s this: am I going out in public because my face looks pretty? Am I showing off or something? Yikes.

Now, don’t misunderstand me on this one: I’m certainly not getting super dolled-up every day, just to go to all my favorite local haunts preening in front of strangers and acquaintances. I’m no Kardashian. If you know me at all, you know that my standard makeup MO is to appear as natural as possible. I’ve never been one of those ladies who looks like she’s wearing a lot of makeup. But, isn’t that a little bit worse? A little more deceptive? Diligently applying makeup in order to give the appearance that I’m naturally poreless? Kinda sketchy now that I look back on it (you know, with a whole TWO DAYS worth of hindsight and wisdom and perspective).

So no, I wasn’t showing-off in a show-offy way, but in a somewhat more pathetic, somewhat more self-satisfied way. I’m pretty sure one of the reasons I do so much of my work outside the office is because I like to be seen looking nice. And it pains me to say that in public. I care so much about how other people see me, even strangers, and I’ve placed so much of my value in being recognized as pretty. It’s really humbling to stare so directly at my flaws, both character and physical, and it’s hard to not feel compelled to cover them up.

I’m glad that putting some much-needed distance between me and my makeup bag is already revealing some handicaps in my character, but I’m not going to lie: I’d rather you all didn’t know I’m so shallow.

Even now, after recognizing that I care way too much how people see me, my primary concern is that people don’t think I’m too shallow. When will I stop caring how people see me? And where is God in all of this? Why can’t I look to him first, like, ever? Why is it so natural for me to seek first the approval of others? I really, really want that to change.

———————–

We did some filming at work today, so I had to “put my face on,” and a funny thing happened: I really didn’t like my “made-up” face. It just looked…wrong. Like I was trying too hard. So, when I was done shooting, I went into the bathroom and washed off the makeup (just like I promised I would, y’all!), and it was actually somewhat relieving to get that stuff off of my face. Not that I like my naked face any better, because I don’t. But still. Washing it off felt good.

2 days down, 38 to go! Have any of you started going makeup-less? Tell me all about it!

xoxo,

mj

Day 2 of 40

Day 2 of 40

——————————–

For details on the “Fresh-Faced for 40 Days” makeup fast, check out this post.

Please join me! You can participate as passively as cheering me along (I will need lots of encouragement), or as actively as joining me in fasting from makeup for the full 40 days. I would love to have some ladies on this journey with me! If you’re interested in joining me, I’ve made a Facebook group where we can keep each other updated on our progress, post links to our blog posts, and generally hold each other accountable. Obviously, we’ll all be starting on different days, so it’ll be fun to cheer each other on through the different stages.

Also, feel free to use the button I’ve made (in the left sidebar, on the top) to link-back to the original post, so you don’t have to do all of the ‘splaining to your friends if you don’t want to.

Or, you can just subscribe to my blog over there in the sidebar, or follow me on twitter @melissajenna.

If you have any questions or comments, please don’t hesitate to share them. I always love hearing what you guys have to say.

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9 Comments

  1. Has anyone ever told you that you look elegant?

    Reply
  2. Chauna

     /  June 29, 2012

    I stopped wearing blush about 3 weeks ago. And I stopped using foundation several years ago. My skin can now finally breath and is starting to look healthier. A natural dewy glow! 😀

    Reply
    • That’s so encouraging! I don’t have a lot of blemishes, but I’m hoping that the ones I do have will clear up as a result of not wearing makeup. That would be a fantastic side-effect!

      Reply
  3. Tom S

     /  June 29, 2012

    You say that you care a lot about “how people see you”.
    Can that be masking that fact that you care “THAT people see you”? If so, ask yourself what sort of validation in life you are seeking from them.
    I love going to the park. There you can find exhibitionists and voyeurs. Both of those categorizations have negative connotations, but I don’t intend that.

    People who post on YouTube are mostly exhibitionists. They post the image of themselves they hope the world to see. Then they ask for subscribers, and probably regularly check their view stats.

    Exhibitionists are not necessarily shallow. One can’t deny that Taylor Swift, noted good girl, definitely falls into the exhibitionist camp. I guess what matters is what the exhibitionist is trying to exhibit or what the voyeur is trying to see.

    You, I find use your face to get other more important messages across, an admirable means to an end.

    Don’t fret it. In my opinion, most makeup is a waste. However I consider it an even bigger waste to plan to spend 40 days obsessing about it. Really girl? That’s what you plan on focusing on for the next month and a half?

    Remember , “I am my beloveds…”, so let Mike decide how you should be made up and be done with it.

    If Ellie runs away screaming in terror at your naked face, well she will just have to get over it. At least you will know you are dreaming and need to wake up.

    Reply
  4. I have been following your journey closely! Wow….
    Can I say that in comparing your day 1 picture and your day 2 picture, you look wonderful in day 2! And its because your smiling. I think you look really great when your happy, and it seems like maybe the lack of make up is allowing your happiness to shine through 🙂
    I am so tempted to do a fas tof my own. I thought about it this morning but my “fast” consisted of only foundation. I can’t break away from it!!!!
    Well hey…. at least I workout with no make up. Thats gotta count for something!

    Reply
    • I made it a point to smile in the pictures I took that day. There going to be on the Internet forever, so I might as well look as nice as possible. 🙂 You CAN break away from it! You can you can you can! The more you feel like you can’t, the more you need to try it. 🙂 You can doooo iiiiiiit!

      And believe it or not, I had makeup on even when I was working out, so you’re lightyears ahead of me already. 🙂

      Reply
    • I agree with OrReet_Designs :). You look lightyears more beautiful when you’re smiling 😉

      Reply
  5. Hillary

     /  July 6, 2012

    I hate hate hate wearing makeup!! I wear it to church or my birthday mayber lol. It makes my face itch, wipes off on my hands and with eye makeup I can’t scratch my eyes. I thought I was the only one!!! sometimes i’ll do some eyeliner and mascara

    Reply
  6. Julie M.

     /  July 6, 2012

    I remember a time when I swore I would never even let my future husband see me without make-up. Of course I was a young teenager and thought I would wake up extremely early so I could put on make-up before he woke up and saw me sans make-up. Of course by the time I was married that wasn’t the biggest concern anymore, but I remember a Sunday I got to church and realized I had been so busy I forgot to put on my make-up. I was mortified!! Thankfully my mom was there and happened to have make-up in her purse and I ran to the bathroom to correct the situation. WHEW! That was about 13 years ago… Today, I hate wearing make-up most days. I do wear it for church and nice events, but for the most part I don’t wear it and don’t miss it. I do make sure I am dressed nicely and I do my hair so I don’t look like I don’t care about my appearance, but the make-up is no longer something I obsess over thankfully. 🙂 I agree that it is so freeing.

    Reply

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